On the 27th of September, legendary actress Gwyneth Paltrow will be marking an incredible occasion as she turns 50 years old. The actress is mother to 2 children whom she shares with ex-husband Chris martin. She has had an illustrious career with many amazing performances. Most recently she is known for playing the role o Pepper Potts in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.
The actress no doubt has had a full life with much to reflect back on, both good and bad and she did so in an essay posted on her own Goop Blog.
In the essay, Gwyneth reflected upon the mistakes that she has made during her 50 year long life.
She said:
“My errors, which live in the shadows, slippery and dark, are harder to define. Not because I don’t know what they are, but because we keep them hidden, out of the logbooks. I have hurt people, never intentionally, but I have done so just the same. I have let people down by not being who they needed me to be. I have betrayed myself to keep the peace. I have crossed lines, the thoughts of which sometimes rip me from sleep and suspend me into the hollowness of shame for a long, dark night.”
Paltrow continued though, that her biggest regret in the end was not speaking out but rather remaining quiet. She said:
“Most regretfully, and so often, I have not spoken my truth to spare some perceived consequence, that hurting someone will tear us both apart. My most lasting mistakes and the mess that comes with them have all stemmed from me not standing fully in my truth and speaking from it, come what may. Saying the words that could have spared seasons of heartache and repercussions. No. This does not feel right to me. Your expectations are not appropriate. Your behavior is not appropriate. This relationship is no longer right for me. This project is not right for me. You are no longer right for me.”
Paltrow also went on to accept that she is far from perfect and has plenty of flaws herself. She said:
“I would like to fully acknowledge myself. I am imperfect, I can shut down and turn to ice, I have no patience, I swear at other drivers, I don’t close my closet doors, I lie when I don’t want to hurt feelings.”
Paltrow ended the essay with some words of wisdom regarding the power of retrospect saying, “I really won’t know what it was like to turn 50 until much later, when I can reflect back from a higher perch, perhaps at one of their 50ths, hearts full and broken simultaneously (as that is life).”