“Your call is important to us, and will be answered in the order that we feel like.” The headache of cancelling with the cable company is universal, and Saturday Night Live decided to put host Kieran Culkin through the nightmare in a hilarious sketch during last night’s episode.
The clip started with the Succession star merely wanting to cancel his cable package, as he’d broken up with his girlfriend and was moving out. However, a group of hapless Spectrum employees were determined to make the process as difficult as possible — whether that meant Aidy Bryant’s Tanya asking for the “42-digit customer pin number that came on [his] first bill” or Mikey Day’s customer service rep in training transferring him to a Domino’s pizza guy.
Along the way, Culkin is constantly offered a land-line upgrade he definitely doesn’t want until eventually demanding he be transferred to the person who can actually cancel his cable. That supreme being ends up being Spectrum himself (a.k.a. “the source, the nexus, the provider”) played by the floating head of Bowen Yang.
“There is nothing I cannot do. For I am made of pure data!” the omnipotent cable god boasted, nearly causing Culkin to break character in a fit of laughter…before offering him six months of free Disney+ as a last-ditch effort to keep him as a customer.
Elsewhere on last night’s episode, Culkin played a ska-loving skateboarding horse jockey. Yes, your read that right.
Meanwhile, Season 3 of Succession, which Consequence recently called “a treat to watch” in our review, is currently streaming its first three episodes HBO Max.