TVLINE | Knowing what she’s carrying doesn’t mean it’s top of mind in every scene — but it is always there. How much were you thinking about that split between what’s going on inside her and how she’s presenting herself on the outside, especially depending on who she’s with?
I’m always fascinated by us as human beings, and therefore as characters — what is public, what is private. What do you share with your best friend? What do you share with your mom? What do you share with your colleagues? How do you present yourself at work?
I think there is a very clear divide with Baran. We haven’t seen her in her personal life, necessarily. We’ve seen her briefly mention her son and the color that that brings out in her. We saw her in that scene when she calls her neurologist — that’s as private as we’ve gotten with her. And then in the last episode, we see different colors with Dr. Robby that feel earned.
But I think with anybody, we all hold trauma in our bodies, in our minds. Whether you were bullied as a child or displaced from your homeland or whatever it is, we carry this in our life. It shapes the way that we see the world. It shapes the way we relate to the world and people.
And so I think with Baran, this manifests in a medical condition that she had very early on, when she was five. And it’s a foundational part of who she is and how she exists in the world, and the resistance that the world has shown her, and the obstacles and the hurdles that she’s had to overcome as a result. She’s become very good at hiding, but she’s not irresponsible. So she really does prioritize her work, and serving and caring for patients, and would never want anything to come in the way of that.
It’s something that she has learned how to manage her entire life. She has a very clear, very ambitious medical track, and has worked in a variety of fields — from research and clinical informatics, to working with Doctors Without Borders, to working at the VA — and now, Pittsburgh Trauma Medical Center. So she has learned how to manage it, and how to hide it from the colleagues that, if they knew, they might try to jeopardize her position.But she has always been forthcoming and honest about it with the people that matter, like her medical team and her neurologist, who have always been advising her. So it’s a delicate balance that she’s had to live with her whole life.
The fact that she has overcome these obstacles is so impressive — that she is the woman that she is, in the position that she has, despite all of this. Or really because of all of this.Because I would argue that it has made her an even more generous, more caring, more brilliant doctor as somebody who has lived on both sides, as the doctor and the patient, and as someone who lives in such close proximity to her mortality. It changes everything.
